Muito mais do que só eu, num sim ou não

CronicaKennedy Alves747

É muito difícil enxergar o próprio progresso. Todos os dias vivo, mas pelo jeito esqueço de me acompanhar.
Banho, espelho, café, transporte, trabalho, piloto automático.

As coisas estão passando rápidas demais, venho experimentando sabores ao longo da vida e nem sempre consigo prestar atenção em todos.
Há dias daquele gostinho doce do bom momento, da boa lembrança, aquela que pensando com carinho na gente, nas boas fotos, chego a cogitar que a teoria da relatividade está certa, rs, porque me esforço pra lembrar e tenho certeza que todos os bons momentos duraram só quinze minutos.
Mas os quinze minutos duraram das 12h até as 17h, vezes uma estação de metrô, um filme no sofá da casa de alguém, ou um dia no meu quarto desarrumado.

Sempre só quinze minutos.

E o contraponto que vem no gosto amargo do momento ruim, aparentemente dura uma eternidade.

Será que os bons momentos são sempre poucos?

Nessa correria, nessa falta de atenção, conheci gente que se foi rápido como a dor dum beliscão, mas teve gente que mesmo que pouca, mesmo que só quinze minutos, tenho até hoje a cicatriz.

Teve vez que o dinheiro caiu na conta e quis comprar uma passagem pra longe daqui, ou vez que com o mesmo sentimento, só dava pra comprar pão no domingo a noite.
A verdade é que não sei como cheguei até aqui, porque não sei exatamente onde eu estou.

E a minha pergunta é: eu realmente preciso saber?

O porquê abri a porta, o porquê saí pelo portão?
Por que liguei pra ela ou por que não me demiti?
Por que insisto ainda em ficar?
Entre uma faculdade ou outra, um bar ou um passeio,
Uma série ou uma vida,
Eu estou aqui.

Sei que to aqui, não sei onde pra onde vou, nem sei se quero ir pra onde não sei, só sei que preciso continuar.

Pelo que parece sou muito mais gente que só eu mesmo, há muito mais peso no meu sim ou não, do que os 72 quilos que eu imaginei.

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